Hanging Back

Okay, I know, I know.  I have neglected this blog in a horrible way.  I apologize to the 2 people who actually read it, lol.  I have (now as an app on my phone, to prove how crazy things have been in the last few weeks) multiple lists of things to do, one of them a list devoted solely to blog entries I've been wanting to write.  A growing list of things I've noticed and want to type my two cents on, but haven't been able to, because I've been trapped under a big rock and couldn't reach the keyboard.  Well, not really a rock, just swept up in the wave of everyday life and things that demand attention because they are piling up and I'm the only one to address them.  To make matters even more, er, interesting, I've spent the last two months battling a heinous sinus infection (or acute sinusitis, as my now growing body of research calls it)

awaiting my return...

and juggling that with a profound sense of burnout and apathy about my creative pursuits.  The likes of which I have not experienced since one other occasion way back in highschool, when I defiantly declared that I planned to stop the art altogether and be more "normal".  

parts arranged and abandoned :o(

For all of a week, I managed to keep all of my projects and ideas closed off in a little room my parents had allowed me to use as a sort of studio.  Somehow, I ended up creeping right back in there.  Or something drew me back in there, whatever.  I couldn't stay away.  And that was the longest I had gone without drawing, painting, sculpting, etc., ever.  Until recently. 

maybe later, siiighh

Fortunately, just like back then, after allowing myself a sort of hiatus to shut off the creative machine to just rest and get well physically, and to address some things in other areas of my life, it's slowly returning, the wheels of tireless inspiration are squealing back into motion.  It's funny how after a rest, it seems to come back stronger than before, lol.  And I earnestly hope, that with it I can get back on track with 1+ entries here a week.  I think it's good for me to write this, and I really hope someone else gets a little something from it, too.  Inspired, and I wish you inspiration...

Wordless Wednesday

Mmmmm is not a word, right?

Blogger's Day of Silence

I've been a bit of a busy girl lately, tending to aspects of my life and work other than this blog, but it's been on my mind, as I looked forward to a moment to get back to it and record my latest thoughts.
Another thing that's been on my mind and in my prayers is Japan.  I don't have friends or family there, except those in my giant human family, and anything I could say about it would only be an echo of the words and feelings of disbelief that have already been floating around as people directly and indirectly affected try to sort it out.
I've been silent here and haven't been able to post as a result of everyday responsibilities, but I'm writing this short note to punctuate that with an acknowledgment of a blogger's day of silence that's happening today, Friday, to signify that the people of Japan are in our thoughts.  Something of this nature defies explanation, but demands strength, and I pray they feel us sending it.     

Help Japan

Monday in Disguise

Okay, I've checked just about everything I could off my list for today, so the sane thing would be to wrap it up and go to bed.  I am going to bed.  I got plenty on my list for tomorrow.  But I couldn't go without saying what an uncharacteristically lovely day it was for a Monday.  Sure, I had lots of work to do, but I had plenty to stop and be thankful for, as well.  This morning, before things got rolling, I successfully took some quiet time to do some reading, prayer, and just being thankful for a new day wide open with opportunities.  That's big, because it's something I believe is important, but, in my crazy busy life, I have yet to be consistent with it.  But like exercise first thing in the morning, it sets an excellent tone for the day.  They say it takes 21 days of consistently doing something for it to become a habit, and it's worked for me on other stuff, so... it was a total bonus that I spent this time outside in the sunshine, where it was beautiful, quiet, and peaceful, with just a light breeze blowing and a woodpecker going at it on a nearby tree.  Siiiiiiiiiggghhh.
 Anyway, things kept on that track as I received orders and kind messages from regular customers.  People appreciating my efforts, especially the creative ones will never fail to put a smile on my face.  And the rest was just a blur of the satisfying pursuit of checking things off my list, finishing some pieces, adding to others, packing shipments, updating things online, etc..  That's how I like a week to start!  Didn't seem like a Monday at all.  Could'a been a Thursday, maybe ;o)

Wordless Wednesday...

the Morning After

I've already blogged (on my old blog) about how I think holidays like Valentine's Day are a load of crap, and nothing but a way for card companies, jewelers, and florists to capitalize on people's disillusioned expectations, so I won't rehash all that, lol.  I will say that I had a revelation recently that folks who are not inclined to be "retail romantics" the rest of the year should actually like this capitalist imposed day, because they can provide the obligatory flourish of token gifts and gestures on this day, then spend the rest of the year relaxing on their laurels, every so often reminding their significant other of the special day they paid fo- er, created.  Just think of how making a little fuss on the one day could rack up points for the whole year!   

Wikipedia's definition doesn't seem to quantify any dollar amounts or material gain prerequisites in the formula for love (yes, I realize that in the real world, money, and the flow of it is an unavoidable thing). I maintain that I prefer a man with whom I can exchange everyday gestures that say we care: "honey, I made dinner", "babe, thanks for taking the car for an oil change", "sweetie, I scrubbed out that ring of grit you left in the tub...".  

I don't know what my male counterparts think (chime in anytime, guys!), but in my opinion, in everyday life, these things add up to more than one day of forced gift showering (course, a girl couldn't turn down an impulse "just because" token, but I want something because you thought of me and wanted to do something nice, not because you think you'd better or I'll be ticked).  

All that aside, everyday is a day for love, with people who understand what that is.  Wouldn't it 

be awesome if everyone recognized the loved ones and the "soulmates" all around them (not just their significant others), and recognized everyday as an opportunity to share and demonstrate love in their words and actions?  I am thankful to know lots of people who do.♥

The Monster in the Room

This could  make me a snob, but I have a particular loathing for gimmicks.  If you want me to shun a new movie, a product, or brand, just show me a bunch of cheesy, gimmicky advertising for it.  Corny product lines designed to maximize profits on the latest thing (action figures, bed sheets, auto ornaments - barf) are the worst!  Top it off by having the general public think it is the coolest thing since sliced bread, and it really doesn't stand a chance with me.

I'm not saying I never come around, but if and when I do, I do so grudgingly.  I was probably one of the last earthlings to see a Shrek movie, and, though it had its funny moments, after seeing one, I'm good.  So when they started hyping up the new android cell phones (and couldn't seem to give it a rest), I was saying "here we go...", and defiantly declaring my loyalty to my (not so old) faithful Blackberry.  Thus far, I had been able to accomplish everything I needed to with the apps on that phone.  My yearly credit towards a new phone had become available from my service provider, but, nope, I was sticking to my guns, no matter how much people I knew raved about their insanely capable, super smart android smart phones.  I did finally begin considering some of the newer options for future reference, but I was not going to be one of the masses programmed to run out and plunk down their hard earned moulah to snag the next big thing.  Then the unthinkable happened.  One night (not so old) Betsy gave up the ghost.  I managed to shrug it off - it said "service required" on the screen- I would take it to my provider's service outlet and have them fix 'er up and it would be fine.  Not so much.  Went to pick up my device from the service outlet, and the representative said it seemed to be working again.  But by the time I got home, I realized that it must have just been a temporary return from the great beyond, because it was kaput again. :o(  All that rep gave me was a goofy come on and a phone that still didn't work.  So I resigned myself to deciding on a new device, all the time grumbling that "big brother" musta zapped my phone so I would have to concede and get on board.   I chose a phone and used the upgrade credit I had been trying to save for later.  I've been gradually getting accustomed to it, but I refuse to be an android head, running around, obsessed with my phone and showing everyone what it can do.  It may have finally won me over the other day, though.  I had a customer in another state who had ordered a piece of jewelry and couldn't figure out, despite the instructions I sent, how to make a small adjustment to the piece to personalize it.  I was at a loss, until it occurred to me to use my phone to make a short tutorial video, then upload it so she could see it.  It worked like a charm.  The video helped, the customer was pleased, and I was pretty impressed with this device.

grrrr!!!

It had helped me provide great customer service, on top of helping me do regular administrative stuff for my business.  But we'll see.  I can still be a skeptic can't I, lol! ;o)  Ha, once it makes 3 wishes come true, then I'll really be impressed... let's see, extra money, Mr. Amazing, new levels of artistic success... hey wait, I did see some interesting apps available for download...

defeated purpose

Today in my usual chasing my own tail/knocking down walls/attempting to build Rome, I began to think my success at becoming more disciplined, focused, and calculating in getting more work done faster worked against me.  Where do I get off thinking I'm some sort of robot that can just punch things out like an assembly line?
The air was not right in the studio from the start, but I couldn't stop wrestling with it for some reason. I can joke about it now, but I was in a frustrating place, because I went in there first thing with a must do list of things I expected to finish today, once and for all, no exceptions!  But the paint, paper, glue, canvas, lighting, etc. had a different plan. I'm usually pretty balanced about these things, and when I have a day where stuff just refuses to work right, I put it all down, go off and do something else. But I think I rolled in with the wrong attitude in the first place, and that set the tone for little things to go wrong, left and right, as though something were testing me, saying, "ha- who do you think you are- you can only control so much!".

I think the issue is, that in a need for control, I am a chronic list maker. I frequently make lists, both mental lists and on paper because I want to feel that I am accomplishing things and making progress in my personal life, my creative work, and in business. I am at the point where I get a high when I can check things off, lol. It started out as a great way to get goals on track. Lists of small, doable steps are great for getting things done. But this constructive practice may just be backfiring on me. It's bad, because the more I get done, the more I need to get more done (twisted, right?). I'm like some B movie monster that's consuming cities, growing bigger, only to consume more! The point is not to make a list for the day, then have a cow when you can't check anything off! I gave myself a headache because some paint didn't dry right? What is that?!?!
Dear Me: Let it go- go watch a movie or read a book and go to bed!  Tomorrow is another day!

Wordless Wednesday

Thursday Happiness

Okay, on a routine cruise through the grocery store this afternoon, my eye landed on something intriguing in the produce dept. You don't wanna shop the produce department with me because I'll always find something new and odd to examine and try, lol. In a basket displaying only about 8, were these giant citrus of some sort. Sorta grapefruit-like, with the typical speckled citrus fruit skin, but closer to cantaloupe size.  Upon closer perusal I learned that the yellow green globes were called red pummelos.  I had to have one. But just to lower the risk of wasting my $2.50, I googled the exotic things while I waited in the checkout. Satisfied that they were a safe bet, I went through with it. I brought the over-sized fruit home, sliced it open for a snack, and was pleased to find the description right on.  It was like a sweet, less bitter/acidic version of a grapefruit, and it was very refreshing. I knew I'd gotten my money's worth for another reason, though- that strange piece of fruit turned into gold! Okay, not really. But looking at the newly sliced fruit, I saw a new painting. The first still life I've done in a while, but I'm excited!  Hey, it's the little things for me, cuz they add up ;o). Anyway, the unveiling  will happen soon, hopefully. Once I've found time around the 500 other projects already going, lol.

New Days

With the beginning of a new year, I look forward to clearing out old and making room for new.  It's one of my favorite ways to set the tone for a new year, and an exercise that is less painful and more cathartic than a hard and fast list of resolutions.  This new year's it sort of began involuntarily in my world, as old stuff pooped out on me and had to be replaced (my cell phone for one), and has picked up speed as I've examined different areas of my life and surroundings where tweaks were necessary.  I make it a sort of fluid, organic process, quietly going down a mental "fix, clean, ditch, donate, and/or replace" list.  I look at stuff in my home, work, social, emotional, and spiritual realms, including the people in those areas with a critical eye (considering what's helpful or a positive presence, and what's not so much), make quick, confident decisions and move on.  It feels great, and gets me on track for making my year ahead the best it can be!  The old adage, "out with the old and in with the new" could never ring truer for me, and I'm looking forward to some great new things this year...

A Gift Makes a Gift

My website is undergoing renovation, but folks who stop by can see a few new things, including a short project demo for a piece I recently completed.  A link on the homepage will take you there:  www.reneezanceart.com.

the finished piece

The piece was a little gift I designed and made for my mother, in remembrance of my grandmother.  Nana passed away several years ago, but she loved hummingbirds, and at her funeral, and in encounters since then, my mom has seen real hummingbirds.  She'll go outside or look out of a window and see them sometimes.  I've often told her that Nana was sending her love, and one day the idea came to me to create this ornament as a constant reminder.

The demo shows the steps I used to make the ornament for those curious about my process.  It was a very enjoyable project, and the bonus was that mom loved it.  I invite you to take a look!